Bear spotted!

You guys someone saw a bear!

In Washington DC!

No, wait. In Lancaster, NY!

Ack, sorry, in Waltham, MA. Or Bucks County, PA? Or Rhode Island?

What’s with ALL THE BEARS?

Well if you’ve wanted to know what’s with all the black bears (Ursus americanus)? I am here for you.

The bears are not sweeping over us in an army of fur with desires for our bird feeders and garbage (though…well…ok maybe). This is an issue of life cycle. And the clue is in the timing and the size.

First, it’s June. And second, these bears are, where we have photos of them, oddly small! Yes, people often will put captions on their FB posts about how it was SO BIG but most of the ones covered in the news are, to be honest, about the size of a healthy mastiff.

Why? Because these are teen boy bears making dumb teen boy bear decisions!

Here’s what happens: As you probably know, bears (black and brown, but today we are on the East Coast, and so we’re dealing with black bears) hibernate. Brown bears REALLY hibernate, plonking themselves in deep dens, dropping their body temperature and metabolism, and sacking out. Black bears, however, aren’t deep hibernators. They lower their metabolism to save energy, but their body temperature stays high. They react to sounds and activity around them, and on warm days may even get up, shuffle around, get the kinks out and snack. They are also, honestly, often kind of crappy housekeepers. Some will find lovely deep covered dens in piles of brush (the baby bear I’m holding here had a mom who denned in a big pile of fallen wood from previous tree thinning), or a nice pile of rocks with a good cave in there (climbing in to those is an adventure, probably much easier on four paws with long ass claws). But others just kind of snuggle up against a fallen tree with almost no cover, go into a good size hole in a living or dead tree, or under someone’s deck or shed.

During this time, around December or January, female black bears also give birth to between one and four cubs. The babies are small and hairless, but by about March or April, they are, as pictured above, cute AF, though still very dependent on mom for nursing, keeping them safe and clean, and regulating their body temperature (which is why you have to keep them warm in your jacket while the vets are working on mom. A terrible hardship, I assure you).

They then stay with their mother, learning how to be bears, for 18 months. Count on your fingers, and you will see that June is the 18 month mark, the point that which black bear moms boot their teen bears out of the nest. They literally run them off.

The young bears then are on their own. Female bears often end up staking out territory adjacent to their mother’s. Males, however? They have to get out. They travel off, trying to avoid grown male bears who will make their lives very, very miserable.

On the East Coast of the US, that means male teen bears move east! Black bear populations have been recovering from near extirpation on the East Coast (you might, if you are curious, read my book on the subject! It’s very good if I do say so myself). Most of them started in the mountain ranges on the western parts of the Atlantic seaboard. So spreading west for these young bears isn’t an option. Those areas, nice and forested, with small towns, national forests, state parks, and national parks, already have lots of bears. The bear-free option is east—where a lot of humans live.

And many of these young bears are well suited to that lifestyle. If their mommas raised them in suburbs or exurbs, they probably already know how to break into trash cans, how to find a good dumpster, and how to take down a bird feeder with ease. Suburbs are scary, they have roads, and people—often people who really don’t want to see bears. But they have opportunities too.

So the black bears people often spot this time of year are young bears on the hunt for new real estate. They follow their noses and might accidentally end up in a subdivision, where they get funneled by decreasing green space into neighborhoods. And the poor bears end up in a blind panic.

If all goes well, the local fish and wildlife finds the bear, darts it, and moves it off to another location with more wild land and fewer freeways (sometimes they chase it off out of a barrel trap with the assistance of bear dogs, which hound the bear off and make it clear this is not where they want to be). If it does NOT go well…people gather around to see it. They want to see a BEAR! It’s so exciting. They might feed it. Try to lure it for a cool experience and pictures.

The bear might attack someone’s chickens. Their dog. A person.

Fish and wildlife can’t just dart that bear. In that case, the bear ends up dead. And no one ends up happy. No bear biologist I’ve ever met wanted to be a bear biologist to kill bears. And yet, that’s what they end up doing, often many times every year.

Let’s be clear, the bears don’t want to be in tight neighborhoods any more than people do. Most bears ending up in places like this are passing through.

So, what should we do?

If you see a bear in your neighborhood:

• Don’t get close. Make noise. Talking (a calm “hey bear, how you doing, my name is…” works well), waving your arms, etc. Back away. Do it calmly.

• Get inside. Do not climb a tree. Black bears are way, way better than you at climbing trees. Don’t run.

• Keep your animals inside. If there is a bear in your area? Do not let your dog off leash. I don’t care how good it is. Dogs esp love a bear challenge. The bear will win.

• Call fish and wildlife. They’ll let you know what you should do.

• Do not feed the bear. Take down your bird feeders, lock up your trash, don’t feed your pets outside. Protect your garden (bears love corn. Everyone loves corn, honestly).

• Do not try to get good pictures or a cute or exciting experience.

Above all: Don’t make this about you (sorry, friend of mine who definitely tried to drive around and find the bears, thank you for your confession, you are absolved). When you see a bear in your neighborhood? That bear’s life is in your hands. What you do next affects the rest of its existence.

I believe in the bears. And I believe in you!

Be bear aware! Click and share!

Where have you been?

Is it reading this article on exercising too much? “We’re reinforced by co-workers and relatives who are impressed as we recount our feats, as well as strangers’ social media comments and likes. Athletes who go to the most extremes are often rewarded by glowing profiles in major publications, influencer partnership deals, even shoe and apparel brand sponsorships. Of course, those giving us shout-outs or money don’t know what this excess of persistence might be costing us.”

Is it reading about the new approval for cell cultured chicken? No price tag is mentioned but I’ll bet it’s gonna be $$$.

Is it reading about the meteorologist who had to resign from his job due to threats because he talked about climate change? Sigh.

Where have I been?

Talking about pests with the podcast Outside/In! In which I admit there’s probably at least one animal that is beyond redemption. Yes, I said it.

And a reminder that I published a big, massive feature last week. These things seems small but they take months to write, you travel, you call tons of people, and then most of it never sees the light of day. Features are like icebergs, the bit you see is maybe 1/10 of what actually when into it. Anyway I hope you like bats.